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What's "Lagniappe"? . . . "lan-yap" is a Cajun word which means "Something Extra".

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Just when I thought it was safe, now I'm even more confused. . .

Television newscasters who SHOUT during commentary! I can hear them without shouting. And just in case they don't know, there's this new invention, it's called a "VOLUME" button on television or remote. And with TiVo, another invention, if it's missed, it can be played back. And there's also another invention, a "CLOSED-CAPTION" feature, if actually deaf. And if they're shouting, their ass had better be on fire running out of a burning building, not reporting on a hot new nightclub opening, outside in a parking lot 4 blocks away from the club.
Ummmm. . .what am I today (besides crazy, of course)? Am I "colored", "Negro", "black", "African-American", "Afro-American", what is it today? Can someone coordinate a friggin' memo so that we can all be on the same "page"?! 'Cause I'm sooooo tired of being corrected as to what I am. This political correctness has gone too far. Can we just go back to being blunt?! Well, I guess it doesn't matter anyway, because in the south, I would always be just the same, and that's on a good day!

Toiletry commercials. Why? Is there someone out there who doesn't know what these items are and how to purchase these items in stores? If so, they purchased a TV before purchasing the necessary toiletry items? "Uhmm, do you have any toilet paper?" "Nope, but I have a TV, sit down, maybe it'll tell us where to get it from." While these commercials are a perfect opportunity for a snack, music or channel surfing break, it's like watching "Celebrity Boxing" - you're asking yourself "why?" the whole time because you already know the ending. But think about it... some ad exec spent time & money thinking of a commercial for say "tampons", which never turns out to be realistic. Only a woman with 10 children who just had unprotected sex would be dancing in the streets and grinning like a mouse with cheese during that time of the month!

And what's a "hemorroid" (ask me if I care if I spelled it right)? But if I have one, do I need a commercial and am I sitting down waiting for one to come on? Whatever it is, the commercial is scaring me. Please make it stop, it and whoever keeps getting the "hemorroid". Ok, find a happy place now.

Third-party welfare checks and the people who present them as a method of payment. Out of control. Out of control.

People who drive hoopties that you can hear coming a mile away, who actually have the nerve to yell, "Don't hit me!" because they assume you can't see them. Yeah, I always consider running a piece of fiberglass into a piece of metal, the only thing holding the hooptie up. Maybe we're trying not to see (or hear) them, which is why we're looking elsewhere while we're waiting for them to get that piece of crap out of the way.

Kids, or anyone, who tries stunts from a show (and now the movie) called "Jackass", and the people who have sympathy for them. I'm sorry, but I couldn't help but laff after seeing the damaged kids. Because, aaaah, the show is called "Jackass", which should not be a baby-sitter for a child or a show to take notes and make to do lists from. Then, the parents who protest a show called "Jackass" who are given serious airtime as if this is a real problem, instead of reminding kids the show is called "Jackass" and, if attempting the acts seen, would permanently be remembered as, you got it, a "Jackass".
Breast implants and the reports on "horror stories" resulting from them. And....the problem is? But, wait, shouldn't the problem be "I'm not happy with myself so I'll stuff something fake inside my chest to make me happy or feel wanted and desirable" to other shallow people? This has got to be the stupidest problem on the face of the earth, especially given other more serious, non self-created problems. And if you've got $5,000 or more to spend on FAKE breasts, you've got $5,000 to travel to impoverished parts of the world! You'll then see REAL human suffering for a change, then see if you're still worried about having larger breasts.

Ladies, learn to be happy with yourself first and stop judging yourself based upon what others have. You're given what you're given for a reason!

Little old ladies in 700 or 800 series BMW's (or a Mercedes sports coupe) on the freeway in the fast/passing lane, driving 5-15 below the speed limit. Please bring back the horse and buggy for these people, PLUH-EAZE!!! TODAY!!! They've obviously failed to understand the concept of power behind one of the top 5 fastest vehicles in the world. "Can you please just touch the gas pedal...just a smidge...would ya, could ya...today???" It should be a law that if you see one going slow in the fast/passing lane in a BMW or Mercedes, you have the right to take their car and hand them a horse and buggy (and a map so they know which direction to "mosie" on along in). This new law needs to be written in their sales contract, and over emphasized by the dealer who sells them the car.

Hot Topics

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Whooo chile...the war! We're now entering Afghanistan. There's no turning back now. Afghanistan has been fought so many times and the outcome was always the same: lots of deaths and nothing accomplished. This situation is crazy, but even moreso SCARY. I wouldn't be surprised to find out from a recent video aired in the news that our government escorted Osama Bin Laden to safe housing as all the men were uniformed in the same manner. Hiding him would further justify the need for a war. And how did they just happen to get that video a year later of what is believed to be Bin Laden being escorted? Hmmmm...makes you wonder. True, we needed to open a can of whup ass after 9/11, but on the right person, not an assumed person.

The 2002-2004 2002-2008! Economy. Economists are hopeful because of a .2% drop in the unemployment rate? Yeah, ok. Does that mean that more people now have more money to buy the same crack they're smoking? What color is the sky in the economists' world? Is it the color of crack? Have any economists even stepped outside their door or world and looked at the actual people who are not working? Forget about WorldCom's and Enron's bankruptcy. What about the number of individual bankruptcy filings and home foreclosures? Put the crack pipe down, step into rehab, THEN look at the numbers again.

Robert Blake's Arrest. Ok, so ummm, when I first heard about the murder, my only thought was: She was murdered by a gunshot, and he JUST happened to leave his gun at the dinner table? "Saaay, did anyone turn in a gun? I was sitting at this table (where my back was NOT against the wall) and think I left my gun somewhere around here, 'cause I need my gun to protect my wife. If you find it give me a call. Thanks." Don't do the crime, if you can't do the time. I guess he's got time.

These broads who are killing their own children. Everytime you turn on the TV or read news online, you hear another story about a depressed mother killing her own children. One in Philly returned all the way from England just to kill her children. Has the world gone mad? I mean, couldn't they just take a walk...off a cliff...alone? The child wasn't the problem, they were! And what is up with these crazy mofo's leaving their kids with these crazy ass broads. Hearing the Andrea Yates story was just shocking because everyone who knew her personally kept saying, "she was having problems" or "she wasn't herself", and the husband was like he didn't know what to do. Ummm..here's an idea, stay the hell home and take care of your children! Lesson One of Parenting 101: Do not leave your children unattended with derranged mofo's. It's sad because the murders were avoidable. My mother worked 3 jobs and came home stressed, REALLY STRESSED. She only had to say something once to get her point across. But damn, I don't recall her trying to kill us, even on her worst day.

Seven Most Important Things

1. Being happy, and I finally know what it means to be happy!!! PRICELESS.

2. Laughing with my friends until I can't breathe! These things can't be bought or sold, and keep you grounded for life.

3. The simple things about life, like a flower or smile from an elderly person, that are truly beautiful.

4. Being around people who truly care and will be there in good times and bad. (Job 5:18-19)

5. True friends who love you no matter what. And that includes God as a friend! No matter what, He's always there, even when you think He's not or you're too busy to care about Him being there. (Ps. 51:16-17, Ps. 44:3, Ps. 25:3)

6. Knowing that you mattered to at least one person, but this is unfortunately sometimes unknown. (Job 4:6, Ex. 23:1-9) But just by being kind to one another, you'll know that you mattered to someone and you could be the difference between someone hating the world and destroying everything in its path, or someone loving the world with all its flaws and for all its beauty. Luckily, the latter is contagious!

7. Knowing what forgiveness of others really means. (Matt 18:21,22, Eph.4:32, 2 Cor 2:7-10)

Interesting Links

Daydream Project. Well, the graphics are interesting. But what's up with the text?

Da Hayle?? - L.A. County Coroner's Giftshop. What I want to know is how they recruit new customers.

Astronomy Picture Of The Day and other pretty cool pics and information

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