somehow I knew Dean was gonna respond to this one for several reasons.
anyway, she loved a heterosexual man and had an idea that their man/woman/child family would be together forever or that the heterosexual love was reciprocal.
perhaps in your confusion and being given a daughter, you possessed stronger feelings for her that both of you interpreted as love. however, your ultimate desires are for men, not women, therefore, she loved a heterosexual man who could not fulfill her heterosexual needs and thoughts (a heterosexual man who couldn't exist), thus her hurt which she is probably taking internally, which is normal for anyone to blame themself first either for not knowing sooner or NOT being told sooner, as in the person didn't have enough respect for me to tell me sooner before more feelings developed.
people's hearts are not toys, they're the essence of their soul.
it's like getting involved with a prostitute who's always around, shares feelings in a caring way, but the trick's ultimate goal is getting paid and moving on to higher paying customers, while the other person involved is twisting their sincereness and caring with love.
if you give people facts at all times or in the case of a prostitute, make it clear up front that only a fantasy is being provided, the person can make the right choices ahead of time, not have them suffer the consequences of not knowing later. sidebar

- many people still fall in love with hookers daily even knowing it's a fantasy.
just my human opinion